A confession: on many occasions we view the Cambodians as something different, strange, almost alien. And not without good reason, mind you. Because people here seem not to follow the same rules we do. The western logic that we all accept as a given basis for our actions, thoughts, relations and mere existence becomes void. There is no planning for the long term – people here would rather make a buck today than two tomorrow. There is no visible method of organization – the concept of what should come first and what should follow is either nonexistent or completely haphazard. The whole concept of cause and effect is erratic.

It’s a source of much anger and frustration. Many times it causes us to change our plans, abandon certain tasks, or just plain feel impotent in dealing with the local community.

Take, for example, the local custom of sending a representative of each family to participate in an event. We found out about this when we began building the new CCC (Chi-Phat Community Center). It started out with the intention of recruiting the adult community in Chi Phat; we wanted to get them involved in what we are doing here, and also, we needed their strength and experience in building. But on the day itself many children showed up, saying that they have come in their parents’ place. We were left baffled – this was an effort on the part of the community, but not the kind we were looking for. Again, we have failed to fully understand the cultural nuances of the local society.

This past Sunday I went to the riverbed with the kids from the secondary school, to collect sand and gravel. We rode a tractor there – maybe twenty children and myself. They all chattered together in Khmer, and paid little attention to me. Watching them, I began to make out familiar patterns. The girls sit together, separate from the boys, and talk quietly. The boys, on their part, are loud and rowdy; they make fun of each other and crack a lot of jokes which, to the non-Khmer ear, sound as though they might be dirty.

At the riverbed itself, they joke around and tease each other. Boys throw things at girls, girls slap boys' arms... Watching them I recall field trips in high school. We must have looked exactly the same to the outsider - all disorderly and noisy and uncouth. Turns out teenage hormones are the same in every language. It's a nice reminder of that truth that I sometimes forget here - that essentially we are all the same.